MY ENVY SAVED HER–(based on a true story)

So the Nollywood-ish thing happened today, not just to me but with somebody I know.

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So the Nollywood-ish thing happened today, not just to me but with somebody I know.

 

Of course, her father has a chain of electrical shops in Onitsha and Kenyatta market. Her mum is the head of the department in one private university at Emene. She’s the last of five, the first two(a boy & a girl) are successfully and happily married, the third child, Chika, is an on-air personality with an apartment in GRA, Enugu. The fourth child, Tobe, is a fashion model and a fashion blogger. She sends 2 boxes of beautiful clothes and designer bags to Sassy thrice a year.

So you see, she had every reason to come out and tell us about how so bright life is. She didn’t have to work part-time jobs during any of the school breaks or to create and sell contents (that you won’t get credit for). She had her life all figured out, so when she started making posts about depression and anxiety; I was shocked and very much angry. What is wrong with this girl? What does she want again kwan?

I asked some other of our friends if they’ve spoken to her lately and they all said no. According to them, they’re too busy trying to survive. I knew they all detest the fact that her life was all figured out but what they hated most was her 24/7 optimistic view about life.

I wanted to know why someone who always bragged and argued about how so beautiful and resourceful life is, was talking about depression; so I chatted her up with how far.

The three dots that appear when someone is typing, appeared. Sassy never always replies a WhatsApp chat till she’s done with Twitter and Instagram, so when she hurriedly sent a reply, I knew something had to be up.

She replied with fine o. Normally, I would’ve said, ok o but something somewhere kept nagging at me to pry further.

So I went ahead to ask where she was. She replied with, just at home o. I asked what she was doing and she said nothing at all.

Two hours from the time she replied ‘nothing at all’; I will be on my way to the cinema. So I asked if she would love to go with me. I would not have insisted if the cow I was supposed to go with didn’t cancel at the last minute.

We were seeing ‘up north’. When we got there, she was gloomy and most importantly, she had no makeup on. I had spent an hour trying to look better than her; at least if I don’t beat her in money and clothing, I hoped to beat her in make-up. But sitting down there, with the movie already gone half and Sassy looking as pale and horrible as she has never been make-up competition wasn’t my greatest worry anymore.

I took out my phone and secretly whatsapped her BFF, Cynthia.

Cynthia said she too is shocked by Sassy’s behavior. No, she doesn’t think it’s a boyfriend issue. No, she is not broke. We both laughed at that.

That’s it! I hate being in this situation, so I just went ahead and asked her:

What is wrong with you?

…Huh?

Don’t do that, you heard me.

…..Nothing is wrong with me.

Sassy, you never go out without make-up. Let’s not talk about your horrible outfit. When have you ever gone out dressed like a caricature of Hailey Quinn?

She giggled. Somehow, it made me feel lighter. So I asked again, what’s up?

She looked at me, her eyes were glossy and her body movement screamed “I am fucking tired” or maybe “I am pregnant?”

I waited for her to talk; I wasn’t interested in the movie anymore. I could suddenly see it clearly now, Sassy was really suffering. Her eyes were swollen, dark and very ugly. Her lips, dried and chapped. Her ponytail was loosely packed and poorly brushed. She wore a black hoodie and a grey-dirty bum short with flip-flops.

I was getting uneasy with every second that went by without her speaking.

She looked up at me, she was crying now. Honestly, I was confused asf!

What is going on? I kept asking myself.

I didn’t know what to do so I hugged her and let her cry.

Sassy was suffering from mild depression and anxiety disorder. She said that even though she had access to whatever she needed, she still felt empty and unwanted.

She confirmed my suspicions about the ‘boyfriend issue’ but that wasn’t her major concern. She felt like everyone around her were with her because of the material benefit. She knew that we didn’t like her very much; she also knew that I of all our friends envied her the most. Cynthia told her. But what she didn’t know was that Cynthia speaks and hangs out with her boyfriend more often than normal.

I didn’t pry into what sort of boyfriend issue she was having.

When we left the cinema, she looked at me and said the most shocking thing I have ever heard.

….Thank you for pulling me out of taking my own life.

I have heard about people committing suicide but I have never been so close to a suicide case like this before. According to her, by this time tomorrow, news of her death would have circulated around school.

For a second, I was angry; I wanted to tell her to fuck off. How can she be so popular in life and still strive to be popular in death too?

But when I looked at her again, my anger vanished. I was glad I envied her. If I cared less about her lifestyle, I would not have noticed her status.

 

This story is based on a real life experience.

by -CHIOMA OKWU

more by chioma okwu

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